#armywifeproblems

Only one week into our marriage and the army has already one-upped us.

Jack's unit was scheduled to deploy in October; he even went to training in California for a month during our engagement to prepare for it. Shortly after he returned, his unit found out that they were going to be a task force that stays behind. True, he could be deployed anywhere in the world within 14 days come October, but we figured we would at least have more time together. Then, he found out that he was being moved to a new unit and was going to be given a new platoon. (A platoon is essentially a group of 30 or so guys. As a platoon leader, Jack, well, um, leads them.) He was bummed to leave his old platoon, but he met his new platoon yesterday and was feeling pretty good. Until he went into work this morning and found out that he was being moved to a different company with a different job within this new unit...the kicker: this new company is scheduled to deploy in October.

When he called me this morning at about 8am to tell me, I was surprisingly okay. I honestly think I just said: "Okay, that's okay. It will be fine." And I still feel that way to a point. I mean, I couldn't really expect anything else. I had been emotionally preparing for him to leave eventually (although I had lately been thinking we would be together for Thanksgiving or maybe even Christmas). But throughout the day, it has hit me more and more. Throughout our crazy long distance relationship, I found myself counting the weekends until we could see each other again (because the number of days was just too many). Now that we are finally together, the number of weekends we have left is just not enough. Why is it that time is always our closest friend and our worst enemy?

Now the preparations will have to start for his deployment. He already had to come home today to pack  uniforms that would be be sent to Kuwait in the next week. I am so new to army life--I don't really even know what I am supposed to do. We will have to visit JAG tomorrow to figure out legal and financial logistics (apparently we need POAs for EVERYTHING), all before we have even joined our bank accounts. I am sure there will be more packing, more shopping, more paperwork. But emotionally? How do we prepare for this separation emotionally?

I honestly don't know. I'm sure there will be lots of stress, and that is scary to me. On top of the deployment, Jack is starting a new job with new people, and all the friends we made in his old unit will not be a part of our lives. I guess it's time to put on my big girl panties and just love my husband as much as possible, make some friends, and deal with whatever life sends our way with joy and a positive outlook. And to pray that everything will be okay (which it always is eventually, even when we struggle).

I am trying not to complain. We both signed up for this! Well, he signed up for this--I signed up for him. ;) There are some positives to this deployment (and we are both going to have to remind ourselves of these positives in the year):

1. He is going to Kuwait, and Kuwait is not a combat zone. To be clear, he could be sent to a combat zone from Kuwait, but we won't count on that. 
2. This deployment will help us appreciate each other more than we will realize. I can tell it has already hit us that our time together is limited and that we have to make the most of it. 
3. These nine months of living by myself will be a chance to grow up and become self-sufficient, e.g. to learn how to mow a lawn and other things (yes, my family does own a lawn company...no shame). 
4. Our newlywed stage is going to be seriously prolonged by this 9-month separation. It's like being newlyweds for two years instead of one, right?! 
5. We will learn to live in the present, to truly be present with one another. Oh and give each other presents. (Just kidding on the last one, but now that I think of it, it might be easier to give early birthday and Christmas presents...)
6. I'm sure I will think of more eventually. But come on, there are only so many positives when it comes to deployments. 

Anyway, the point of this post, if you were not able to read my lengthy prose, is that we found out today that Jack is deploying in October, and that we are going to have to switch gears, buckle up, and hold on to each other tight...because this ride is about to get a little bumpy.